If the picture of the out of place jelly beans is driving you to distraction, you might be a perfectionist.
I was. I’m learning to accept myself as I am warts and all. It’s been a long climb, from the little girl who coveted gold stars in piano class, to a woman who can look in the mirror and smile at the not so perfect hair and the wrinkles on the brow.
I’m feeling much more comfortable in my own skin. I’ve stopped the harsh judgments of myself and others – and that’s made all the difference. It’s nearly impossible to live a simple, joy-filled life if you are constantly badgering and berating yourself for being less than perfect.
I’ve come to realize that if I send out thoughts of judgments and criticism, then that’s what I will get back. One of the Universal Laws is that like attracts like. And so, if I am critical of myself or others, I will draw, just like a moth to a flame, people who are critical of me or themselves. I’ve started a campaign to love myself more; to validate all the fabulous things I am doing and being, and to be my number one cheerleader.
Why wasn’t I doing this before?
If you have to be in control and perfect is your middle name, then you might ask yourself the following questions before you start your next project:
Ask yourself, “Is my goal realistic?” You might want to think about whether you usually perform to this level or is this the level you think you “should” attain?
If this is a “should”, then ask yourself whose should is it? Yours? Your mother’s? Your boss’s?
Ask yourself whether you can concentrate on the process this time around, instead of just focusing on the result. Can you make the process fun, not a chore?
Evaluate your success based upon how much you learned and how much fun you had. Yes, fun can be a determinant of success!
If you are anxious before starting an activity, ask yourself: “What is the worst thing that could happen?” Confront your fears before you start the activity. By naming your fear, you gauge its potency and work to set yourself up for success.
Recognize that many positive things can only be learned by making mistakes. When you make a mistake ask, “What can I learn from this experience?”
Don’t beat yourself up. Nurture yourself and give yourself some positive feedback, even if you didn’t accomplish all that you expected.
I’m working on this – constantly. I’m learning to accept myself as a fallible human being. I do not have to strive for perfection. Mistakes are permissible. I have the right to be wrong.
What a freeing concept! It’s a giant step for this perfect little girl that was raised to please others, but so well worth it. Here’s to more jelly beans, perfectly separated or not, just for fun.
Please share the love! Thanks for reading, and if this post resonated with you, please share it on your favorite social networks. Every share, like or tweet helps me reach more women who crave support in leaving their perfectionist energies behind. So glad you’re here!